I never thought I would hear the word, “Niiiiice” come out of my mouth in response to a 78%.

However, I did not study for my most recent organic chemistry exam.

Both are things that are completely uncharacteristic of me… but at the same time, considering my situation, I figure a C in the lecture is a win/win situation.

Worst case scenario, I can take the class over. I’m made a B in last year’s lab, and I will have made an A in this year’s lab. Laboratory stuff is fun, hands on, and totally enthralling. Plus I can raise my grade through writing awesome research papers. I love labs. (Never thought those words would come out of my mouth, either!)
So the game plan is this:

Study hard for the ACS (that’s American Chemical Society) final exam, which will be held on May 15th. Also, I need to write two questions for my lab final on May 13th. After I’ve taken those exams, I can focus on writing my two research papers, for which I’ve been gracefully given an extended deadline. I *will* make it through this semester, however flailingly. In spite of a reckless appearance (much like Bad Yoga Bob), I’m holding it all together surprisingly well. And this will NOT be the end of the world, as much as I questioned that two weeks ago.

I’ve run my scenario past a professional, and she commended me as well. It’s no wonder I’ve been having anxiety– I’m experiencing some significant stress… but she gave me some helpful tools to combat it. And one can never have too many tools in the handbag of mental wellness.

All in all, I feel good. I feel like I can do this, and do it well. I feel like I will have no issues with organic chemistry and the MCAT because I can certainly get some help between now and then… and I have at least one friend (and several Kaplan classes) that give me an advantage in revisiting the material.

I am a tiny bit concerned about my FAFSA stuff– but I’m sure I’ll figure that out, too. Basically, I think I maxed out my financial aid allowance, and am $43 K in debt, and still have several years before I’ll earn my bachelors & pre-requisites.

Alas, I’m going to figure that chicken out, too. Ultimately, I cannot be stopped, persuaded, re-directed. This is what I’m doing, and I will freaking figure out all the paths I can take to get there, and that’s just how it rolls.

I will get through this rough path, and I will look back and say, “Hey, Universe, that wasn’t so bad, **next time try harder!!!!**” BWAHAHAHAAHA.

Not really. I’d rather the rest of my life come easily.

*nods*

So mote it be. *?*